Inappropriate relative was here again this weekend. Within 10 minutes she had let slip that she was ill the week before. Without even being asked why, she told us that she had a cough and a stomach bug: "So everytime I coughed it was coming out of both ends".
Lovely. Really lovely. And then I heard her recounting the story to another relative 2 hours later. Have some pride woman, we don't want to hear about your nether regions every single time we see you!!!