Sunday, March 29, 2009

Earth hour

So I overrode my non-environmentally friendly husband's moaning and switched off all the lights for Earth Hour. If nothing else it'll save us a few quid on the leccy, I might do it every night. So I got out all the candles, Baby Babs was in bed, I thought "ooh how romantic, my luck might be in here". Husband complained for 45 minutes that it was too dark and then fell asleep on the sofa. The romance is dead...

Online confusion

So, I have three different internet updating things going on, this, Facebook and Twitter. At the moment I am trying to cover different topics on all three which is bloody hard work. And why? I have a few friends who know about all three of them, and while I am sure they don't want to read the same things three times, why am I bothering?! I know you can get your Twitter updates to show up on your Facebook as updates but I had to stop that as it was bothering me. And on here I am kind of anonymous which is great when slagging off the neighbours or immediate family.

I don't know what my point is.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Twitterings of a Rock God

So I signed up for Twitter after Lady L did. And it confuses me. It's like the best bit of Facebook (the updates) but on a different site. And as I didn't have many friends on there I started following famous people instead. And then Chris Cornell started up on it. And it weirds me out.

Firstly, I can't be sure if it is actually the real Chris Cornell. He updates so often - surely a bona fide rock star would be too busy throwing tvs out of windows and being off his face on JD to tell the world silly things all the time?

Secondly, if it is indeed the real Chris Cornell, his updates are usually so banal (for a rock star, sweet for a normal person) - he misses his kids, he's getting on a plane etc etc. , that my long held adoration is being tampered with. I blanked out the fact that he was married with kids now, and held on to the fact that he was living a miserable alcohol-raddled existence as he knew that I was married with kids now and he had missed his chance.

So it begs the question: would I rather know what he is having for his tea tonight or hold on to a long held obsession with a "Chris Cornell" who obviously doesn't exist in the real world? At the moment, nosiness wins everytime. I'll just have to find a new Rock God to replace him :)

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Call the social!

Today Baby Babs decided to headbutt the toilet trying to retrieve Bob the Builder from underneath it. He has a marvellous shiner now. This adds to all the other cuts and bruises that adorn his body (legs mostly) as he is a clumsy little boy at the moment. We were in the supermarket after said toilet incident and BB decided to do a runner. I had to chase him out of the supermarket and finally caught up with him, and like a good mother, proceeded to chastise him for running off.

It was only afterwards I realised what we must have looked like. Young child legging it, covered in bruises, big black eye, chased by irate mother, then manhandled into buggy kicking and screaming. I looked like I beat him regularly! How bad is that?! And I can totally see how easy it is for people to get the wrong end of the stick and report you for child abuse. Scary.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Warring mothers

Oh my god. I am stuck in the middle of the most ridiculous situation. I know a mum who has a little girl just a bit younger than Baby Babs. I know her through someone, I wouldn't say we were friends particularly, but well enough to exchange presents last year for the kids birthdays. This year my friend has fallen out with the mum and they don't talk anymore. I don't see this other lady much, just at the baby group if she turns up, which she hasn't been doing, probably to avoid my friend. Last time I saw her, we bumped into each other in town just before BB's birthday. She was super friendly and then surprised me by giving BB a present for his birthday. I hadn't seen her since. And it's her little girls birthday on Monday. I got her a card and was wondering what to do about a present. I felt like I ought to, as she got BB one. Then today she turned up at baby group, pointedly ignored both me and my friend, and refused to let her little girl play with our boys.

So why do I feel really mean about not giving her a present and possibly not even the card?! Wouldn't it look stranger if I did give her something considering the fact I haven't spoken to her for 3 months and when I see her she ignores me? It wasn't my argument and I was always friendly to her, I didn't even take sides. This motherhood lark is a minefield. And why do I give a monkeys?!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Say what you mean!

Our neighbours are pregnant again, third one god help them. But they have made no secret of the fact they want a big family. Today was the first scan, after which you can tell everyone. I was in the garden when Mrs Neighbour told the old lady who lives on the other side of them. She is the one who told me when I was heavily pregnant that her granddaughter had just had a baby and it was disabled, and I ought to be prepared just in case. Thanks. Anyway her reaction was priceless!

Pregnant lady: I've got some news for you. We're having another baby!"
Old lady: "OH MY GOD" (in a voice of doom)

Now even if you think someone is crazy for having another baby, and you think it might have been a mistake, you don't actually say it to their face!

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Supermarket update

I went to the supermarket yesterday, the one that blockaded the aisles. And halfway round I noticed an odd thing, the online shopping order staff with their MASSIVE trolleys were all parked neatly at the end of the aisles, not down them. And they all looked super pissed off that they had to walk a bit further! Hee hee, it really made me laugh! Power to the people! All the funnier as I did email them to ask what their policy was and got a stock reply that "in 24 hour stores, they have to do these things sometime" - despite the fact that my local store isn't a 24 hour one! But they actually took heed and did something. I will feel bad when I get a job in a supermarket and they tell me I am on the online order section though...

Odd babies

Why is it children can make you want to laugh and cry at the same time? This week I had done my ironing and had it all neatly piled up in a basket waiting to go upstairs. I wasn't paying full attention to Baby Babs, he was pootling round between the kitchen and the lounge, but then I realised he was beaming at me very proudly. What had he done? He had very carefully taken my neat pile of ironing and stuffed it in the washing machine! It's his father's fault, when he comes home he makes BB put his dirty socks and pants in the washing machine, and he obviously associates piles of clothes with washing and was only trying to help. I had to laugh while trying not to cry.

Then the other morning I was dozing in bed trying not to have to get up while BB ran riot round the bedroom. He came up to me shouting "Mummy! Eyes!" and I turned round to find him THIS close to my face and wearing my glasses.

He also refuses to let anyone trim his nails, toe or finger, and can spend a long time trying to pick them off himself. But then, unlike any man I know, he doesn't throw them on the floor or pile them on the end of the arm of the chair and leave them there. He puts them in the bin.

The boy is a bit odd.

Thursday, March 12, 2009


Like the wonderful mother I am, I took Baby Babs to the park yesterday afternoon. It was basically a bribe, we went to the library first and I said if he behaved I'd take him on the way home. I've never seen a quieter child! We had the whole play area to ourselves for a while which BB loved, then another lady and her son turned up. And suddenly the play area turned into Eastern Europe. She was Polish and couldn't speak a word of English which made it very difficult to try and converse. The boys got on like a house on fire, chasing each other round and shouting "whee!!" and whatever it is in Polish, for ages. But it made it very awkward, all we could do was smile at each other. We went to another park last week and the other woman in there was Russian, and she was shouting at her kids in that scary "I will kneecap you if you don't get off that slide" Russian way of speaking. How am I supposed to make new friends if Essex has turned into the new Poland/Russia?! I might have to start learning the lingo, at least "how old is your little cherub?" and "do you come here often?". I might get back "he's 3 and we're just waiting for our flight home from that airport we heard Romford had".

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

A different perspective

I've been reading Rumpelstiltskin to Baby Babs recently, and I don't quite remember the dark undertones running through the story. If the girl can't spin straw into gold she must DIE and if she succeeds she gets to marry the king. How gracious of him! And then Rumpelstiltskin wants to take away her first child to do what with I couldn't figure out. Probably eat. Luckily Baby Babs doesn't really understand, he just likes listening. I'm going to have to vet all the books in future, perhaps our library only stocks the dark versions of stories, like the one where the Three Little Pigs are spit-roasted by the wicked wolf, and Little Red Riding Hood is sold into white slavery by her Grandma who is secretly involved with Mr Wolf, and who moves to Tenerife with the profits after being helped to find a villa with A Place in the Sun.

I bet these versions exist somewhere...

Friday, March 06, 2009

Reasons to live in Romford

I am always a bit scathing of living in Essex, not being born and bred. But our local paper this week listed "100 reasons to live in Havering" and there are some gems. I am quite proud now. The highlights?

1) Five Star come from Romford.
2) Seal lived in Romford for a bit.
3) Jilly Cooper was born in Hornchurch (posh bit).
4) Steve Davis the legendary snooker player was discovered playing in Romford Snooker Hall.
5) Ian Dury came from Upminster (posher bit).
6) The Prodigy filmed the video for Voodoo People in Romford Market.
7) John Motson bought his sheepskin coat from a man in Hornchurch.
8) Frank Lampard was born in Romford (can't have it all) and Tony Cottee lived in Collier Row (rough bit).
9) The Beatles played in Romford twice in 1963.

And the piece de resistence?
10) Richard Madeley comes from Romford!!

And the most bizarre fact:
11) There used to be a regular air service between Romford and Paris in the 1930s. I wonder if they were only one way fares? Who would want to come back?