Poor old Renee...

So after 4 months of marriage and a whopping 15 days spent together, Renee Zellwegger has decided enough is enough and is getting an annulment. Of course no-one ever says why, apart from a very vague reference to "fraud", so that fans of celeb gossip can spend hours and hours trying to decide what happened. These are my theories:

a) Kenny isn't really a multi-billionaire country singer, he is a successful mime artist who mimes to huge audiences, and Renee only found out when she asked him to serenade her on honeymoon and realised he didn't have the voice of an angel at all, more a rusty nail dragged down a blackboard.

b) She is still hung up on that kerazy Jack Black of the White Stripes (or substitute Jim Carey) and only married Kenny in a fit of jealousy/trying to win him back scenario that clearly backfired.

c) She refused to give up her career and go and live in backwater Tenessee breeding loads of kids and only seeing Kenny in between his world tours.

d) He refused to be arm candy and give up his successful miming career to follow her round the world to all her premieres and wait around in dodgy cafeterias while she's off filming.

e) The "fraud" references relate to the fact that she thought she was marrying Kenny Loggins (of Footloose fame) as she was off her head on champagne and pina coladas. When she sobered up she realised her mistake.

f) He thought she could wrap her legs round her head after all that dance training for Chicago. But she couldn't.

Ooh I could go on all night! It is sad, but then at least they can afford lawyers to swiftly annul the marriage and carry on like it never happened. But at least Kenny will be a hit with the girls. And what's with the "annul" rather than "divorce"? Does that mean they never did it either?! Poor poor Renee.