Dribble!

Lady L may well have found the Best Website in the World!! I don't know if it's my current obsession with all things sweet, but I could cheerfully order pretty much everything off this site. If it was a shop I would be there with a giant brown paper bag filling it with 2 of everything and drooling like Homer Simpson :-)

These might be today's favourite.

Lesson # 1

Things not to say to a lady you suspect may be pregnant:

"Excuse me, but are you expecting? Oh, I didn't know, I just thought you looked chubbier"

Chubbier!!!???? Imagine if I wasn't! The shame!! People, if you ain't sure just don't say anything, it's much safer that way.

(And don't tell the lady's husband that she looks "stout". Stout isn't much better)

Outed.

So it's now out in the open, Booky B is having a little book of her own. Kind of weird. So I guess this blog is now going to be full of pregnancy related posts for a little while, I don't really do anything else now I'm an old married. But if it gets too boring I might start making things up instead! BUT I am going to a gig on Monday! Whoo! And it's the fab Automatic - "What's that coming over the hill? Is it a monster? Is it a monster?" And my mission for the evening is to masquerade as a 20 something student not a 30 something married lady of burgeoning girth. Just watch me!

Urgh!!

Spotted on a market stall. Well I say stall, it was just a blanket on the ground near a market:

"For Sale. Bic Razors. 20p each. Only used once in pre-operative procedures."

Sorry Mr Cyclist!

So we ran over a cyclist on the way home tonight. Thankfully he was fine, he was trying to get down the side of us via a very small gap and he attacked the front bumper with his wheel. Usually I get really cross at cyclists, running red lights etc etc, but I thought we'd killed him. He was thrown off onto the pavement and his chain fell off. But he was SO nice. He was apologising over and over for being run over, and said "not to worry, it was only his chain" and told us to get going and leave him (to spend half an hour putting his bike back together probably). Bless him. I felt really bad, and I wasn't even driving! But I guess he won't be weaving through tight spaces anymore.

As for the two women (you know who you are!) I saw this week weaving in and out of traffic with abandon while on the mobile phone - next time I'm taking your number plates and reporting you. Sigh. I think it would be easier to get the train to work sometimes.

Don't hassel the Hoff

What is going on with David Hasselhoff? Last week he was in the news for "accidentally" severing a tendon with a chandelier. I don't even want to think too much about that. Today he has allegedly been thrown out of Wimbledon for being drunk. Of course the toffs at Wimbledon are much too polite to admit to it, and it would ruin their idyllic vision of people who go to Wimbledon all eating strawberries and drinking Pimms and being jolly nice people. They don't want Mitch Buchanan turfing up out of his head, slurring leerily at the lady tennis players and throwing up in a champagne bucket. It's not the rugby you know!

But it intrigues me. He is either on a very misguided PR mission at the moment, or pretending to be a rock star for a while. Before they announce the surprise making of "Baywatch: the Movie!" - coming to a cinema (or straight to the DVD shop) near you soon...